Courage and vulnerability


While looking through my notes, thinking about what I wanted to tell you about today, I came upon a sentence “my vulnerability is one of my strong suits”. You might not believe me, but it’s true. Before I came to this realisation, it was something I was ashamed of.  I spent most of my time trying to hide it, supress it and not show it to others or myself. Controlling this made me feel like I was losing my authenticity, my right to happiness, expressing my feelings and loving and accepting myself for who I am. I accepted the words of the people closest to me- you should be happy, others would be, other people have it worse, can’t you be like everyone else, other people can live like this why can’t you, why do you always want more, this is what life is like and other people, and other people…

Have you ever had these or similar words spoken to you?

In emigration, I meet a lot of vulnerable people, mostly women. They hide their sensitivity behind a mask of the perfect wife, mother, fiancée, who are often involved with men that they don’t love or are in toxic relationships and are taking away their right to be happy.

In this post, I want to inspire you to have the courage to accept yourself, the courage to show your authentic self, to stop constantly being in control and making predictions.

What will you gain from this? You can feel like a child again, look at the world and yourself in a way only a child could. Without prejudice or labels. You can feel free and began your life filled with courage, one your true self dreams of but is trying to forget about.

I am enough! Yes, I am truly enough, I am worthy of love, acceptance, I am authentic. We all have the right to this.

I remember what Brene Brown, a professor at the University of Houston, said. After her appearance on TED six years ago, she became a well-known expert on vulnerability and courage. After multiple years of research on human vulnerability she said, we can pick either comfort or courage. Brene Brown claimed that with courage it wasn’t about winning or losing, it was about showing yourself as you are without knowing if you are going to succeed.

On a good note: you can learn to be courageous. Courage is making decisions every day and deciding on things consistent with our values. The first step is to ask yourself this question: what is stopping me from having courage? When you know the answer to this question you can make your decision: from this day on, I will choose courage over comfort. And of course, practicing this decision every day.

I remember as a child reciting poems at school events. I was always the first one to want to do this. I loved doing it so much, that even the pre-show fear didn’t stop me. Why didn’t I give into the fear? Because it would also bring me happiness at the same time, when I could represent a poem and put my whole heart into it. During these few minutes, I was outside my comfort zone. Even now, whenever I feel fear, it’s a sign I’m going in the right direction.

The most beautiful things in life are found outside our comfort zone, past our fear. If you don’t step out of your comfort zone, you’re going to stay in the same place or someone else with decide what your life should look like.

Have you decided to take the first step? Sometimes you will fail, but if you don’t do anything, you will neither succeed or fail.

Take your life into your hands- in the end, it is your life.

You’re not here to please others. Don’t live your mother’s life or your fathers. Live your own life.

In conclusion, I wish you courage with all my heart.

If you have any questions, I will gladly answer them.


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